Full list of all 85 Goat Simulator achievements worth 2,375 gamerscore. It takes around 4-5 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game.
The base game contains 30 achievements worth 1,000 Gamerscore, and there are 4 DLC packs containing 55 achievements worth 1,375 Gamerscore.
Find all collectibles on level 7
Find all the blocks
Lick the rollercoaster with 6 batteries attached
Go on the catapult with a rider on your back
Buy all hats
I'm Sorry About My Goat Achievement
Fight the turtles
Why did you step in that? Yuck
Hold your own concert
Get up on the skyscraper without using the elevator
Find all the trophies in Goat Ville!
Score 10 points in Flappy Goat
Sacrifice the 3 Sanctum items
Find the Sanctum 2 Walker Statue
Find the Sanctum 1 Walker Statue
We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell
Ride a bike for 60 sec
Visit 5 trampolines in one jump, bouncing on each trampoline once.
Have 10 gas cannisters explode at the same time
Bounce 100 times on mattresses within 30 seconds
Lick the Hanging Glider.
Everything the light touches is your kingdom.
Thrash the Goathenge
Travel to space!
Finish all manual quests
Win the title bout!
Make sure the Hillbilly never drives again.
Hit the party with the Boulder of Death
Do no evil
Become the Queen of Goat Ville
Get deviously trapped again
Unlock the mermaid mutator
Find all the trophies on the MMO Level.
OMG IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS?
Unlock the gravity goat mutator
Visit all zones on the MMO level
Unlock the wheel of time mutator
It never erupts when you want it to.
Trash the server room
Unlock the ExcaliGoat mutator
Baa with the choir
Enjoy your trip
Jörgen
Do a card trick at the magician
Jump on the launchpad
Do a lot of hurt. With your butt.
Kill 7 zombies with one minifun
Clear 25 survival quests in one game
Craft all items in one game
Craft all the weapons in one game
Survive 10 days
Beat the whiplash course without getting wet
Eat 50 food items in one game
Crystallize and break 30 zombies in one game
Use the slippery slide to land in the kiddie pool
Hit 5 zombies in one bullet dive
Paraglide in the air for 1 minute
Hit 4 at once with a voodoo bomb
Make the stew taste as good as HUMANLY possible
Play GoatSimSim for 5 minutes
Just finish that one LAST job.
Find all the trophies on the Payday Level.
Place a Hogtied NPC on the train tracks and wait for the train to arrive.
Wear 30 masks at once.
Win 3 hands at a Blackjack table.
Show off your vehicle air control skills in the desert.
A Trip to the Moon.
Gather the crew for some drive-in movies.
Enable the hydraulic cars.
Use Dolph Spaghetti to lift a crewmember on top of the tallest building.
Listen to the whole pan flute song.
Use a cannon to travel to the Island in the Sky.
Lick all crew members together to form a Goatipede.
Find all collectibles
Gather $1000000
Destroy all freighters
Blow up all pirate ships
Shoot down 30 police ships.
Visit the badehaus.
Complete test chambers.
Pickup a photon sword as father or good goat.
Run wild with the Podrunner.
Find all the pony horses.
Tag 10 walls.
Headbutt all alien eggs