Found this link on TSA guide - I would highly recommend reading it a few times over. Bit of a long read but it will be of much help to you. Cross-Reference the guide while your playing, and it should make this a lot easier than it seems.https://ck3.paradoxwikis.com/Mother_of_Us_AllRefer to "MrC44's" comment for some great additional tips.
As it states: "If the viewer of this page is already familiar with the game, it is advisable to skip to the last section, where a step by step strategy guide is briefly discussed."
I would still recommend going over most of the article, as it gives some nice pointers.