Full list of all 85 Goat Simulator achievements worth 2,375 gamerscore. It takes around 3-4 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game.
The base game contains 30 achievements worth 1,000 Gamerscore, and there are 4 DLC packs containing 55 achievements worth 1,375 Gamerscore.
Score 10 points in Flappy Goat
Buy all hats
Find all collectibles on level 2
Lick the rollercoaster with 6 batteries attached
Find all the trophies in Goat Ville!
Everything the light touches is your kingdom
Finish all manual quests
Visit 5 trampolines in one jump, bouncing on each trampoline once
Go on the catapult with a rider on your back
Hold your own concert
Get up on the skyscraper without using the elevator
I'm sorry about my goat
Fight the turtle
Why did you step in that? Yuck
Find all the blocks
Sacrifice the 3 Sanctum items
Have 10 gas canisters explode at the same time
Bounce 100 times on mattresses within 30 seconds
Become the Queen of Goat Ville
Make sure the Hillbilly never drives again
Travel to space!
We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell
Lick the Hanging Glider
Ride a bike for 60 sec
Hit the party with the Boulder of Death
Thrash the Goathenge
Win the title bout!
Find the Sanctum 1 Walker Statue
Find the Sanctum 2 Walker Statue
Do no evil
Get deviously trapped again
Find all the trophies on the MMO Level.
OMG IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS?
Unlock the gravity goat mutator
It never erupts when you want it to.
Visit all zones on the MMO level
Unlock the wheel of time mutator
Do a card trick at the magician
Jörgen
Jump on the launchpad
Unlock the mermaid mutator
Baa with the choir
Do a lot of hurt. With your butt.
Trash the server room
Unlock the ExcaliGoat mutator
Enjoy your trip
Kill 7 zombies with one minifun
Clear 25 survival quests in one game
Crystallize and break 30 zombies in one game
Eat 50 food items in one game
Hit 5 zombies in one bullet dive
Craft all items in one game
Survive 10 days
Craft all the weapons in one game
Play GoatSimSim for 5 minutes
Use the slippery slide to land in the kiddie pool
Beat the whiplash course without getting wet
Paraglide in the air for 1 minute
Hit 4 at once with a voodoo bomb
Make the stew taste as good as HUMANLY possible
Place a Hogtied NPC on the train tracks and wait for the train to arrive.
Find all the trophies on the Payday Level.
Just finish that one LAST job.
Win 3 hands at a Blackjack table.
Listen to the whole pan flute song.
Gather the crew for some drive-in movies.
Wear 30 masks at once
Use a cannon to travel to the Island in the Sky.
Show off your vehicle air control skills in the desert.
A Trip to the Moon.
Enable the hydraulic cars.
Use Dolph Spaghetti to lift a crewmember on top of the tallest building.
Lick all crew members together to form a Goatipede.
Find All Collectibles
Shoot Down 30 Police Ships
Destroy All Freighters
Blow Up All Pirate Ships
Complete Test Chambers
Gather $1000000
Run Wild With The Podrunner
Visit The Badehaus
Find All The Pony Horses
Tag 10 Walls
Headbutt All Alien Eggs
Pickup A Photon Sword As Father Or Good Goat