Full list of all 85 Goat Simulator achievements worth 2,375 gamerscore. It takes around 4-5 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game.
The base game contains 30 achievements worth 1,000 Gamerscore, and there are 4 DLC packs containing 55 achievements worth 1,375 Gamerscore.
Score 10 points in Flappy Goat
Find all collectibles on level 7
Lick the rollercoaster with 6 batteries attached
Buy all hats
Go on the catapult with a rider on your back
Find all the blocks
Find all the trophies in Goat Ville!
Visit 5 trampolines in one jump, bouncing on each trampoline once.
Bounce 100 times on mattresses within 30 seconds
Everything the light touches is your kingdom.
Hold your own concert
Get up on the skyscraper without using the elevator
I'm Sorry About My Goat Achievement
Fight the turtles
Why did you step in that? Yuck
Have 10 gas cannisters explode at the same time
We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell
Sacrifice the 3 Sanctum items
Lick the Hanging Glider.
Do no evil
Ride a bike for 60 sec
Finish all manual quests
Make sure the Hillbilly never drives again.
Hit the party with the Boulder of Death
Become the Queen of Goat Ville
Win the title bout!
Thrash the Goathenge
Find the Sanctum 1 Walker Statue
Find the Sanctum 2 Walker Statue
Travel to space!
Find all the trophies on the MMO Level.
Trash the server room
Unlock the wheel of time mutator
It never erupts when you want it to.
OMG IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS?
Get deviously trapped again
Jörgen
Jump on the launchpad
Unlock the mermaid mutator
Do a card trick at the magician
Visit all zones on the MMO level
Unlock the ExcaliGoat mutator
Unlock the gravity goat mutator
Baa with the choir
Enjoy your trip
Do a lot of hurt. With your butt.
Craft all items in one game
Clear 25 survival quests in one game
Crystallize and break 30 zombies in one game
Kill 7 zombies with one minifun
Eat 50 food items in one game
Craft all the weapons in one game
Survive 10 days
Hit 5 zombies in one bullet dive
Hit 4 at once with a voodoo bomb
Make the stew taste as good as HUMANLY possible
Use the slippery slide to land in the kiddie pool
Paraglide in the air for 1 minute
Beat the whiplash course without getting wet
Play GoatSimSim for 5 minutes
Wear 30 masks at once.
Just finish that one LAST job.
Win 3 hands at a Blackjack table.
Place a Hogtied NPC on the train tracks and wait for the train to arrive.
Find all the trophies on the Payday Level.
Listen to the whole pan flute song.
Use a cannon to travel to the Island in the Sky.
Show off your vehicle air control skills in the desert.
Enable the hydraulic cars.
Gather the crew for some drive-in movies.
A Trip to the Moon.
Use Dolph Spaghetti to lift a crewmember on top of the tallest building.
Lick all crew members together to form a Goatipede.
Tag 10 walls.
Shoot down 30 police ships.
Blow up all pirate ships
Find all collectibles
Destroy all freighters
Visit the badehaus.
Gather $1000000
Run wild with the Podrunner.
Find all the pony horses.
Complete test chambers.
Headbutt all alien eggs
Pickup a photon sword as father or good goat.