Full list of all 85 Goat Simulator achievements worth 2,375 gamerscore. It takes around 4-5 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game.
The base game contains 30 achievements worth 1,000 Gamerscore, and there are 4 DLC packs containing 55 achievements worth 1,375 Gamerscore.
Find all collectibles on level 7
Visit 5 trampolines in one jump, bouncing on each trampoline once.
Lick the rollercoaster with 6 batteries attached
Buy all hats
Go on the catapult with a rider on your back
Find all the trophies in Goat Ville!
Sacrifice the 3 Sanctum items
Find all the blocks
Finish all manual quests
Fight the turtles
Why did you step in that? Yuck
Hold your own concert
Get up on the skyscraper without using the elevator
I'm Sorry About My Goat Achievement
Everything the light touches is your kingdom.
Lick the Hanging Glider.
Travel to space!
We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell
Become the Queen of Goat Ville
Thrash the Goathenge
Win the title bout!
Make sure the Hillbilly never drives again.
Hit the party with the Boulder of Death
Have 10 gas cannisters explode at the same time
Bounce 100 times on mattresses within 30 seconds
Find the Sanctum 2 Walker Statue
Find the Sanctum 1 Walker Statue
Do no evil
Ride a bike for 60 sec
Score 10 points in Flappy Goat
Find all the trophies on the MMO Level.
Visit all zones on the MMO level
Get deviously trapped again
Unlock the wheel of time mutator
Trash the server room
It never erupts when you want it to.
Do a card trick at the magician
OMG IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS?
Jump on the launchpad
Unlock the mermaid mutator
Unlock the gravity goat mutator
Unlock the ExcaliGoat mutator
Baa with the choir
Do a lot of hurt. With your butt.
Jörgen
Enjoy your trip
Clear 25 survival quests in one game
Craft all the weapons in one game
Beat the whiplash course without getting wet
Crystallize and break 30 zombies in one game
Use the slippery slide to land in the kiddie pool
Hit 5 zombies in one bullet dive
Hit 4 at once with a voodoo bomb
Make the stew taste as good as HUMANLY possible
Survive 10 days
Eat 50 food items in one game
Kill 7 zombies with one minifun
Paraglide in the air for 1 minute
Play GoatSimSim for 5 minutes
Craft all items in one game
Just finish that one LAST job.
Place a Hogtied NPC on the train tracks and wait for the train to arrive.
Find all the trophies on the Payday Level.
Wear 30 masks at once.
Show off your vehicle air control skills in the desert.
Lick all crew members together to form a Goatipede.
Use a cannon to travel to the Island in the Sky.
Gather the crew for some drive-in movies.
A Trip to the Moon.
Enable the hydraulic cars.
Listen to the whole pan flute song.
Win 3 hands at a Blackjack table.
Use Dolph Spaghetti to lift a crewmember on top of the tallest building.
Find all collectibles
Complete test chambers.
Tag 10 walls.
Headbutt all alien eggs
Find all the pony horses.
Gather $1000000
Visit the badehaus.
Run wild with the Podrunner.
Pickup a photon sword as father or good goat.
Destroy all freighters
Blow up all pirate ships
Shoot down 30 police ships.