Full list of all 85 Goat Simulator achievements worth 2,375 gamerscore. It takes around 4-5 hours to unlock all of the achievements in the base game.
The base game contains 30 achievements worth 1,000 Gamerscore, and there are 4 DLC packs containing 55 achievements worth 1,375 Gamerscore.
Finish all manual quests
Find all collectibles on level 7
Lick the rollercoaster with 6 batteries attached
Buy all hats
Find all the trophies in Goat Ville!
Sacrifice the 3 Sanctum items
Everything the light touches is your kingdom.
Find the Sanctum 2 Walker Statue
Find the Sanctum 1 Walker Statue
We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell
Go on the catapult with a rider on your back
Score 10 points in Flappy Goat
Visit 5 trampolines in one jump, bouncing on each trampoline once.
Bounce 100 times on mattresses within 30 seconds
Ride a bike for 60 sec
Hold your own concert
Get up on the skyscraper without using the elevator
Fight the turtles
Why did you step in that? Yuck
Find all the blocks
Win the title bout!
Make sure the Hillbilly never drives again.
Hit the party with the Boulder of Death
Lick the Hanging Glider.
Travel to space!
Thrash the Goathenge
Become the Queen of Goat Ville
Do no evil
I'm Sorry About My Goat Achievement
Have 10 gas cannisters explode at the same time
Find all the trophies on the MMO Level.
Visit all zones on the MMO level
Unlock the wheel of time mutator
Unlock the mermaid mutator
Unlock the gravity goat mutator
Unlock the ExcaliGoat mutator
It never erupts when you want it to.
Do a lot of hurt. With your butt.
OMG IS THAT WHAT I THINK IT IS?
Do a card trick at the magician
Baa with the choir
Enjoy your trip
Get deviously trapped again
Jörgen
Trash the server room
Jump on the launchpad
Eat 50 food items in one game
Hit 5 zombies in one bullet dive
Hit 4 at once with a voodoo bomb
Make the stew taste as good as HUMANLY possible
Play GoatSimSim for 5 minutes
Survive 10 days
Use the slippery slide to land in the kiddie pool
Paraglide in the air for 1 minute
Beat the whiplash course without getting wet
Clear 25 survival quests in one game
Crystallize and break 30 zombies in one game
Craft all items in one game
Craft all the weapons in one game
Kill 7 zombies with one minifun
Lick all crew members together to form a Goatipede.
Use a cannon to travel to the Island in the Sky.
Show off your vehicle air control skills in the desert.
A Trip to the Moon.
Win 3 hands at a Blackjack table.
Use Dolph Spaghetti to lift a crewmember on top of the tallest building.
Enable the hydraulic cars.
Gather the crew for some drive-in movies.
Just finish that one LAST job.
Wear 30 masks at once.
Listen to the whole pan flute song.
Find all the trophies on the Payday Level.
Place a Hogtied NPC on the train tracks and wait for the train to arrive.
Pickup a photon sword as father or good goat.
Destroy all freighters
Blow up all pirate ships
Shoot down 30 police ships.
Headbutt all alien eggs
Find all collectibles
Gather $1000000
Find all the pony horses.
Complete test chambers.
Run wild with the Podrunner
Visit the badehaus.
Tag 10 walls.