liljon2137's Blog - Jul to Sep 19 (1 follower)

Permalink4 Years Later
I tend to keep things in. Always have. I just don't like the thought of burdening people with my personal stuff. For whatever reason though, when I write these blogs once per year or so, I just let it all out. For the most part that is.

Obviously, the streak is still going. I also started a streak on PSN, because I'm a crazy person. That streak is currently at 231 days. Some days I actually get my trophy before my achievement. Obviously, if one has to go, it's the PSN one. I didn't intend on starting another streak, it just sorta happened.

I'm still single, for better or worse. It's not that I don't have the chance to be in a relationship, I don't think I want to. I've had several dates and new partners over the last year. However, none of them really clicked to the point where I would want to date. Dating hasn't gotten any easier though. I hoped the more I did it, the easier it would get. I'm still an anxious mess with no self esteem. I really appreciate my alone time though, so not getting a date isn't the end of the world.

I've started drinking again. My gambling has gotten a bit worse. Nothing serious. I have limits set so I don't dive into these vices too deep and cause some sort of permanent damage or anything like that. I think I stopped drinking and slowed down my gambling before because I was much happier. It's not like I'm generally unhappy now, just not as happy. I think the higher dosage on the anti-depressants helps with all that too.

I miss a lot of things about my old life. Having someone to come home to. Someone to lean on if things got tough. This week was terrible, so I've thought about this a bit this week. There are things about my current life that I enjoy too. While it isn't an even split, I think I'm doing ok.

I'm trying not to be such a recluse. I refuse to go work at home. I'm trying to see friends more. I visit my parents most Sundays. This is against my nature, but it's what's best for me. If I went work at home, I guarantee I would get my groceries delivered, and I would never leave my apartment again.

Work is fine. I am trying to get a new position. I just feel like it's time for something else. But I am still doing well at my current position, so the bosses seem happy, and bonuses are always nice.

In other happenings, I have several concerts coming up. I'm going with my brother and my dad to most of them. Me and my friends are going to All Out next weekend, which should be great. The next day me and my brother are going to a Brewers v Cubs game at Wrigley. I am also very excited for the upcoming NFL season. The Raiders look to be better this year. Them being on Hard Knocks gets me all the more excited to see this team on the field. However, I am prepared to be disappointed.

Games are starting to come out again. The list of games I will be getting seems to be lighter than previous years, but I am nonetheless excited. DOOM Eternal figures to be my game of the year. I don't see that changing. Everything I hear about it is positive, and DOOM 2016 was one of my favorite games in recent memory.

In conclusion, I again want to thank you for reading this. This is literally just the ramblings of a fella who doesn't know what to do. I just sit at the keyboard and blam, there's a blog. As always, I don't expect anyone to read this, and don't understand why anyone would. I just put this out there to get it out. However, if you do read this, feel free to comment or whatever. My socials are the same as my gamertag. And if you ever need help with an achievement that I already have, don't hesitate to ask.

As always, see you next year!
Posted by liljon2137 on 24 August 19 at 04:52 | There are 2 comments on this blog post - Please log in to comment on this blog.