Pretty much exactly a month ago, our favourite schizoid superhero, Deadpool, tore down one of our walls (the fourth one to be precise) and announced
a new game set to star himself as himself. Needless to say, the game is not for the young'uns.
Today, the 'Merc with a Mouth' is following up that announcement with a self-written fact-sheet for the game. Because of its combined informative and hilarious content, we're presenting the fact-sheet here in its entirety.
A NOTE FROM DEVELOPER HIGH MOON STUDIOS
You may be wondering why our game character is writing his own fact sheet. Our team also wondered and wasn’t all that aware of who DEADPOOL was until this red-suited, katana-wielding Marvel Super Hero burst through our door. But after a quick chat over some tacos and some “accidental” gunplay, we decided that he was indeed awesome and wondered no longer. BURP.
THANKS, HIGH MOON! AND NOW, ON TO MY FACT SHEET OF FUN FACTOIDS ABOUT DEADPOOL!
ABOUT ME, DEADPOOL!
Helllloooooo journalistos! Couple things I’d like to get off my chest: Everyone knows I’m the coolest comic book character in the universe – a mercenary for hire with a super charged healing factor the ladies love. I run my mouth – so what? Some say I’m unstable but I’m very stable. (Yep, totally stable) …except for the voices in my head… (What about that time we beat the dude with his own arms?) (That doesn’t count – he had it coming.) And if you want to know what gets me going in the mornings, it’s chimichangas! (MmmmmWfffmmmmwfmmahmmm- oh Chimichangas) WHOA, I feel better now. I also love to talk, especially to you!
PRODUCT DESCRIPTION OF MY GAME STUFF:
I, DEADPOOL, am here to tell you about all the awesomeness that is my new video game! That’s right – I’ve taken over High Moon Studios in order to develop the world’s first-ever video game dedicated to yours truly, ME – DEADPOOL! You may know me as the “Merc with a Mouth,” which means there will be plenty of ME talking to YOU in the game, along with ALL of my favorite things: katanas, big guns (and not just these amazing arm muscles – check!), hot chicks, cameos from some of my X-MEN friends (ooh, spandex!), chimichangas, bouncy houses, and of course…ME!!! I also “invited” my old Marvel pal Daniel Way, who’s put together some of my zaniest comic book adventures ever, to give my DEADPOOL video game a story that pays tribute to ME more than ever! So what are you waiting for? Go write amazing chocolatey editorial goodness about my DEADPOOL game!!!
MY KEY FEATURES OF ME:
- You Get to Play ME – DEADPOOL! Bored after years of stealing the show as part of an ensemble cast, I’m finally delivering what all my loyal fans have asked for – nay, DEMANDED – an entire video game featuring me and what I want to do…or what I want you to do to me…no, wait, as me. That includes appearances by some of my X-MEN friends - Not ‘cuz I need help (I don’t), but ‘cuz Marvel paid me to (wink). I might have made a few changes so you see things like I do. (You can thank me later, Psylocke.)
- So Many Shiny Toys, So Little Time! No video game of mine would be complete without a lot of shiny new guns (bang!), blades (poke!), explosives (boom), duct tape (quack!) and a buttload of other things for me to play with! To capture all of my good sides, I made High Moon Studios make a third-person action game – and yes, my bottom is my best side.
- An All-New Full Frontal Pictorial Story About Me! My Marvel writing hostage buddy Daniel Way (Secret Invasion, Dark Reign) and I have been through many life-changing things together, including visits to a lot of authentic taco stands. (Free life lesson: If it’s hot going in, it’ll be HOT coming out!) Daniel has put together a story that shows off my specialness like never before!
- Fourth Wall…Schmourth Wall!!! – I like breaking walls, especially the fourth one! Why play a game about me when we can’t even talk to each other? I like you. Don’t you like me? Let’s get married. Why are you ignoring me? FINE!!! I’m breaking up with you! I miss you so much. Let’s get back together. Hold me…(and that was just a taste…).
- Did I Mention This is a DEADPOOL Video Game? This is a DEADPOOL video game! That means you get to enjoy over-the-top-poop-your-pants action, smokin’ hot babes and tacos! Not necessarily all together or in that order. (What about that time when…?) Hey! NOT SAFE FOR WORK.
Publisher: DEADPOOL! (with some cashola I borrowed from Activision Publishing, Inc.)
Developer: DEADPOOL! (but I’m letting High Moon Studios help)
Release Date: 2013 (See, the world doesn’t end this year)
Xbox 360® video game and entertainment system from Microsoft
PlayStation®3 computer entertainment system
(Wow, that’s a mouthful! Thanks, legal eagles - for those circle R thingy’s and looooong names)
Suggested Retail Price: I suggest you wait and see!
“RP” (Rating Pending)
Expected “M” (For Mature…or MOOBS, or Merc with a Mouth, or …)
In a totally non-vain or self-promotional way, he's also kindly provided us with some screenshots of himself in action:
If that wasn't enough Deadpool-related awesomeness, he also slung some concept-art for the game our way:
I researched those last two images. Yes, they feature scantily clad Marvel heroines Rogue and Psylocke in special-edition swimsuit comics. No, those comics did not feature Deadpool in any way. Their link to the game is...tenuous. Let's just say, I think Deadpool was presenting them for 'effect'
As he helpfully states in his fact sheet, look for Deadpool in Deadpool
sometime in 2013.