This report is for the period July 22nd to July 28th 2013
Doo doo doo. It's TA Stats time. Doo doo da da. It's number fun with Chewie. Dee doo dee. There are also some Ewoks. Ba doop bap. They're called the Statisticles. Wicky-wicky. But don't get too attached to them. La dee da. Most of them are dead. Dum dum dum. It's Stats!
Just experimenting with a catchy jingle there. I'll leave you to figure out what tune it should go along with, but I was thinking it should be something really upbeat, like this
21,713 TrueAchievements gamers started a total of 31,146 games between them (1,909 different games).
Well, would you look at that. Two instalments for the same franchise sharing the top two spots on the same table. Is that a first? Probably, but I can't be bothered to check. Assassin's Creed II
pulls in big figures thanks to its ongoing "Games with Gold" freeness, although it drops by 3,000 from last week's 4,500 starters. The next chapter of the face-stabbing saga follows with significantly lower numbers thanks to its non-freeness.
Following close behind are the biggest other releases of the last few months and regular features on the table, Far Cry 3
, Tomb Raider
and BioShock Infinite (Xbox 360)
Fairly recent release Deadpool (Xbox 360)
manages to continue to cling onto the table in sixth thanks to there being no other big releases in recent months. I'm sure the Merc with the Mouth is happy to take the lead over the only new release of the week, The Smurfs 2
. In fact, I'm sure I saw run past with Smurfette slung over his shoulder just the other day, having left the rest of the little blue weirdos in various states of dismemberment
disarray. A man after my own heart.
Unlike the success of some other recent Games on Demand sales, none of the titles from the Tom Clancy focused Deal of the Week
make it onto the table. I heard Sam Fisher himself had a little cry about it. But then Deadpool ran past, grabbed him by the nads and told him to man up.Top Retail Games Started
There's not much new going on in Arcade this week, with mostly the same titles as last week. Although it hadn't been free for a good couple of weeks at this point, Defense Grid: The Awakening
continues to pull in enough starters to put it in second, behind the still popular freebie, Spartacus Legends
. The only new release of the week to make it onto the table is Mars: War Logs
in ninth, with the kind of numbers that on a bigger week would see it not appear at all.Top Arcade Games Started
Last week's new release, Halo: Spartan Assault (WP)
, drops one spot into second, below the moustachioed property tycoon Mr Monopoly (WP)
. Even the Spartans fall at the destructive possibilities of Community Chest. The digitised board game takes the top spot thanks to some Deal of the Week action and some alluringly easy Gamerscore. Meanwhile, the previous week's Deal of the Week title, geoDefense Swarm (WP)
, slips into third.Top Windows Phone Games StartedGames Completed
6,937 TrueAchievements gamers completed a total of 9,723 games between them (1,335 different games).
Pulling in those easy completions like nobody's business, Assassin's Creed II
rules the roost on Retail Games Completed by large margin, almost doubling its numbers from last week to 400. The Smurfs pop up in fourth with over 130 completions in its first week. A movie tie-in that's an easy completion? Shocking. Just shocking. Sneaking up behind it in fifth is Aliens: Colonial Marines
thanks to some very belated and completely unmarketed, but also apparently very easy, DLC in the form of "Stasis Interrupted
"Top Retail Games Completed
Like Games Started, Arcade Games Completed tells a familiar story to previous weeks. The "400 Days
" train just keeps on trucking for The Walking Dead (Xbox 360)
, reminding us of how much the game completely dominated the tables for months last year. Despite not holding the highest Completion Percentage, the sheer volume of new Defense Grid
players helps it pull in enough completions to make ninth place. Although its weird to think that a game could have less than 30 completions and still make it onto the table. The Statisticles tell me it's because many of you just aren't playing all that well at the moment and there's loads of games being left uncompleted. Not my words!Top Arcade Games Completed
Not only did Mr Monopoly buy enough properties to win on Windows Phone Games Started, he also built a whole load of hotels to bleed you dry and steal the completion from under you. You shouldn't have traded your Railway Stations! It makes me sad that I still can't count myself amongst the completions for KooZac (WP)
. It shames me as the Stats guy that I can't bring myself to grind through sooooo many numbers. Even the Statisticles find it boring, and they are literally programmed to love numbers.Top Windows Phone Games CompletedAchievements Won
60,827 TrueAchievements gamers won a total of 652,643 achievements online between them (51,022 different achievements).Assassin's Creed II
, obv.Top Retail Achievements Won
For Pete's sake (who is Pete anyhow?)! This is almost a complete re-hash of last week. An Educated Lanista in Spartacus Legends
takes the cherry, The Walking Dead
is the sponge and Defense Grid
is the....plate?Top Arcade Achievements Won
Now you're just showing off, you top-hatted, cane-twiddling prat. You may have all the property, money, starters, completions and achievements won, but you'll never get my "Get Out of Jail Free" card! Oh damn, I just landed on Go To Jail...Top Windows Phone Achievements WonAssassin's Creed
continues to play a hefty role in keeping Action-Adventure well on top in Genre. At the bottom of the table, Monopoly
switches Music & Rhythm out for Card & Board. More like Card & Bored, amiright?!?Total TrueAchievements won by Genre
For those of you who were hoping to have their minds blown away by some thrilling numbers this week, I can only apologise. But I did warn you that this was the week Smurfs 2
was released, and that could only have ever been bad.
Oh no, I spent so long coming up with my opening jingle, I forgot to create an ending theme song, so please feel free to come up with your own and imagine it playing over a montage of hilarious freeze frames from this week's episode.