This special edition of the Achievement Preview Spotlight is being brought to you by fish sticks, Hot Pockets, Crème fraîche, and chocolate salty balls, all of which had nothing to do with the fact that it should have been posted yesterday. Such are the ways of Mysterion.
If you didn't guess, we're going to be taking a look at the most highly-anticipated South Park
game ever, South Park: The Stick of Truth (Xbox 360)
Prepare yourself, these achievements are NSFW and I'm basing this preview solely on the funniest ones... of which there are many.TSOT
features 11 achievements that are locked in the "Secret" closet with R. Kelly and Tom Cruise, tons of fart-based achievements, and quite a few friend-based achievements. At first glance, it's tough to tell if any of the visible achievements are progression related, but really, if you're a fan of South Park
and RPGs, you're probably going to enjoy hunting and exploring through the town to find all of the golden nuggets of humor.
As mentioned at the top, these spotlighted achievements have been selected for preview simply due to their humorous qualities. We'll get into the nuts and bolts of completion at the end.
Stop... just stop. REALLY!? I need to know what the kids think the KKK is when it comes to TSOT
, because this is priceless.
I just... I mean... yes. One of the best running jokes in South Park
is the relationship between Kyle and Jesus juxtaposed with Cartman's well-known antisemitism. Throw in the fact that one of the classes available in TSOT
is "Jew" and the excitement to see how this achievement breaks down skyrockets.
*CUE THE MUSIC*
I already love this achievement if only because it pairs one of the best shows of this decade with Eric Cartman, who might be able to give Heisenberg a run for the title of "Most Devious on TV" (Frank Underwood
is the reigning champ).
"Working" in the education field makes this next achievement almost priceless.
Using Butters as the achievement icon is just the icing on top.
In a serious gameplay commentary, though, these achievements are always a pain in the butt. Getting through an entire game without having anyone knocked out can be a SUPER HUGE mental drain.
While we usually just feature five achievements in the spotlight, these next two go so hand-in-hand that they need to be paired together.
For those not in the know about the origins of this, back in 1966 John Lennon declared that the Beatles were more popular than Jesus
. The pairing and naming of these achievements is possibly one of the most perfect unions ever; kind of like Mr. Garrison and Mr. Slave.
Alright, funny-ha-has aside, let's talk seriously about completion. TSOT
is going to have you collecting these weird things called Chinpokomon
, and has three achievements tied to collecting five, fifteen, and all of them. There are also dueling achievements for selling nothing in the game
and selling 300 junk items
so multiple playthroughs will be necessary. As was obvious in the final two achievements, you're also going to need to make a TON of friends in the game, which might be onerous depending on those mechanics. Another huge achievement is Clothes Whore
, which will task you with completing all available Costume Sets.
But... let's be honest... if you're a fan of South Park
none of this will phase you. With those minor caveats and "Secret" achievements aside, there doesn't appear to be much in the way of road-blocking achievements that will stop you if you're a completionist.
If you're anything like me (and who's to say you're not) you might also be waiting on reviews before deciding to invest in a game from Obsidian. FEAR NOT!
We will have an official TA Review coming in the near future to help you decide!South Park: The Stick of Truth
is set to be released next week.
If there's an upcoming game or DLC pack that you'd like to see featured in the Achievement Preview Spotlight, be sure to let us know in the comments!