For the more old-school approach:
get 2 chopsticks and a load of blu tack.
line up your 3 controllers (one above the other, flat on a table) with a little blu tack to keep them in place. put a blob of blu tack in each dip of the left thumbstick and lay a chopstick across them and then build up more blu tack until you can steer with the chopstick and all 3 thumbsticks move.
add a good sized blob of blu tack onto each A button and lay a chopstick across them too so you can jump with all three at the same time.
play on tadpole. at the start of each section move completely to one side to stack your roads. every chance you get bump them against a wall to restack as they’ll drift a bit unless your chopstick steering is really good.https://twitter.com/quixoticrocket/status/129762027961153126...